When it comes to film, we all love our trash, don’t we folks? You know what I mean. Those films that aren’t great, not terrible, but also have few redeeming qualities. Little to no repeat viewing appeal. The kind of film that you put on in the background when you’re hungover, so your brain does the hard part of switching off for you.
Recently, I watched James Gunn’s DC foray into The Suicide Squad. Now, look, I’m not a comics guy. Nor am I a Marvel or DC partisan. So, to me, it was fine. Just fine. Gory, quippy, kind of ridiculous, and, most importantly, it didn’t feel like all of my time was wasted in watching it. But it did get me thinking: What other superhero trash is out there? Read on and enjoy.
Jumper (2008)
You don’t hear much from Hayden Christensen these days, and I’m pretty sure Jumper is to blame. Coming off his (much aligned) work on the Star Wars prequel trilogy, the former Skywalker had a lot to prove and this big-budget flop about teleporting teenagers and a secret society out for blood was definitely not it. However, if you want to see Samuel L. Jackson camp it up as a dastardly villain, then there’s plenty of fun to be had here. No “motherfuckers” though, sorry. Watch the trailer here.
Hancock (2008)
With the star power of Will Smith behind it, Hancock was definitely a hit, making well over half a billion dollars in box office returns. The viewing experience, however, is a strange one. Smith plays the titular hero, a down on his luck, alcoholic with superpowers who can’t seem to get his shit together. However, once he figures out the issue of branding, then it all starts to kick into gear. There’s a weird second act reveal that sets up a far more interesting story than the one we’re shown here. But still, it beats watching Smith in the original Suicide Squad. Watch the trailer here.
Push (2009)
This film is such a deep cut that I barely remember watching it. Even the synopsis reads like a cookie-cutter script insert: “The film centres on a group of people born with various superhuman abilities who band together in order to take down a government agency that is using a dangerous drug to enhance their powers in hopes of creating an army of super-soldiers.” Riveting stuff. Push is interesting because it came out a year after Marvel’s Iron Man and right before the superhero film fad took enough. But there’s enough in Chris Evans’ performance here that it clearly earned him the nod for Captain America. Watch the trailer here.
The Green Hornet (2011)
In the late 2000s, Seth Rogen was comedy gold and everywhere in Hollywood. However, in 2011, he decided to take the lead action role for an adaptation of a character from a 1930s radio serial. Weird choice but we stan taking risks. So, is the film any good? Not really. It’s kind of a mess and Rogen’s portrayal of Britt Reid is, ahhhh, kind of prickish. But, if you’re after a more grounded, less fantastical superhero story, in the realm of Bruce Wayne style, “I’m rich, so I can bankroll gadgets and solve crimes,” then you might get a kick out of this one. Watch the trailer here.
Chronicle (2012)
Of all the trash in this list, this one might be the most redeemable. Chronicle follows three high school friends in Seattle as they find a meteorite that gives them superpowers. The premise is simple enough but it’s also a psychological case study of power, alienation and paranoia and how—in the wrong, superpowered hands—that type of mental attitude can turn deadly. Real fast. The “found-footage” aesthetic is definitely a relic of early 2010s visual style, but it mostly works here and gives the film a gritty, grounded feel rather than big blockbuster schlock. Watch the trailer here.
Dredd (2012)
Okay, so, Dredd is essentially a rip-off of the (far superior) 2011 Indonesian action film, The Raid, written, directed and edited by the Welsh filmmaker Gareth Evans. All they really did was transport the story to the 2000 AD Judge Dredd universe and cast Karl Urban as the titular Judge. Does it work? Abso-fucking-lutely. This thing is a lot of fun. It’s hyper-violent with lots of cartoonishly evil junkies getting minced with bullets in gratuitous slo-mo. The simple things never go out of style. Watch the trailer here.
Split (2016)
Split tells the origin story of Kevin Wendell Crumb, a man suffering from dissociative identity disorder (DID), who has 23 distinct alternate personalities. Barry, Crumb’s most dominant “alter,” has become violent and kidnapped two young girls. What makes Split interesting is 1) James McAvoy’s incredible performance as Crumb and his alters, and 2) director M. Night Shyamalan’s decision to make the film the first-ever “stealth sequel,” linking Split to Unbreakable (2000) and Glass (2019). Watch the trailer here.
Brightburn (2019)
This one is nice and simple: What if a non-DC, Superman-type-character-in-all-but-name existed and was evil? Brightburn is dumb on its face but thankfully it knows this fact, so the film’s self-awareness allows it to avoid falling into the pratfalls of lacklustre messaging on evil, power and corruption. We don’t need that shit. Not here. Instead, cue plenty of fun horror reversals involving flight, laser vision, super-strength and creepy kids being creepy. Watch the trailer here.
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